Grandpa

I’m a very lucky person. I’ve never had to deal with the death of someone. When the day to face the death of someone I know comes, I just don’t know how I’ll react.

My grandpa had a stroke yesterday. I didn’t knew that information until today, when I was on my way to visit him in the hospital.

I’ve never been prepared on how to deal with the death of someone close, and yet I think (I’m almost absolutely sure) I know how I will deal with it, when the time comes. I suspect I won’t cry, won’t shout, but I’ll be torn inside, I won’t know how to deal with it, so I’ll just suppress it.

He had a stroke ten years ago, and he recovered. Looking back, I can almost go back in time ten years. I don’t think anyone in the family experienced the same feelings today as they did ten years ago, and yet what happened was almost identical.

I’m not very good in externalizing my feelings. In fact, I’m awful when it comes to feelings. So I just suppress them, it’s very hard to look at me and see if I’m extremely sad, or extremely happy.

Anyone, but me. I’m not saying that anyone stopped loving grandpa, or that they are more prepared if he leaves us now that they wore back then. It’s not that. It’s just that they all had different reactions now, different from the ones they had back then. In fact, this time the majority is far more optimistic than they wore ten years ago.

I’m not good in having senses. I don’t have “good feelings” or a six sense that tells me everything is going to be alright. On the other hand I’m not pessimistic, in fact if I had to classify myself I would do so by placing myself in the optimist group.

My feeling this time was exactly the same as it was ten years ago. (And it’s curious I’m able to describe it so well... me that can’t even point into a specific spot when the doctor asks: where does it hurt?) It felt (it still feels) like a thousand hands squishing all my organs, all my veins, all my muscles, everything inside my body felt (still feels) like it was being squished with the strength of a thousand hands.

I’m that guy that can’t stay a day without making a joke. I need to see people around me smiling. I’m not a clown, or at least, I don’t intend to be a clown, but if I find the opportunity to make a joke that I know will make someone laugh, then I’ll make the joke.

Today I found myself making jokes to my cousins in the waiting room of the hospital. I desperately needed to see someone smile. I needed to feel that there was hope, even if it was a very “tiny piece” of hope. I needed to feel it.

What will I be like if I experience the death of someone close to me? Every time something bad happened to someone that is close to me (the stroke of my grandpa, when my sister was run over by a car, when my aunt had a beginning of cancer) I’ve always felt the same thing: This squishing inside, this unbearable weight on top of every organ inside of my body. This anguish that removes my usual optimism.

Today I felt the hope I needed to feel when I saw my grandpa smiling. When I saw his face illuminated by a big smile. It felt as all those stupid thoughts that I had in my head wore taken away, all at the same time, and all just by a smile.

So today I’ll go to sleep with just two things on my mind. The first one is my grandpa’s smile. The second is the fear of losing that smile.

I need your smile. I need you.

Just a little text

I’ve been struggling to not write in my blog!!!
So I’m using my sister’s computer.
I want to write about so many things… but I guess I’ll end up just writing about how happy I feel.
I’ve ended the first part of my masters and my Italian classes are also going extremely well…
I’m even finding friends in the most improbable and unexpected places… really!!!
Hum…. Not a very long text…but without computer it’s hard!!

When your computer is broke

My computer does not work...
Yes I have the company computer, and yes I can use it without anybody saying anything, but I don't want to... they don't pay me to blog...
So I guess this is an announcement of a formal pause until I buy a new computer... probably in January.

:-p

Loads of things!

Well haven’t written much here… and it looks that in the next months my “regularity” will continue… irregular… it looks like my laptop isn’t fixable. Guess I’ll have to spend time looking for a new one… (and money :-p)
Well I now like my job (in reality I think it’s the first time I can say this), but at the same time, I don’t think I’m quite as good as I thought I would be. The problem is I think I’m able to do better, but for that I would need help (like in school :-p) but as I’m working, I don’t have the support someone would expect in a university (but as I’m not in a university…). Well, even with that in mind, I have to say: I really like my job. I’m learning new things every day and fell that I’m getting better every day. I’ll have to see how the next month or so goes in terms of work productivity, but I really believe that it will be good.
Talking of other things, I went to Porto again and this time was different. We stayed there 3 days and ended up seeing much more… but I guess I’ll have to go back more times… I can’t believe that when I visit a city, the thing that I like most is something that’s not from that city… the thing I liked most was the Salvador Dali exposition… absolutely fabulous… and I have to say: I’m absolutely flabbergasted (weeee I used this word) with one of their traditional dishes: “Francesinha”… I think it’s my new favourite dish... well at least until I try something new :p
To end, my Italian classes have begun and… I’m loving it! I really need this sort of activities… I need to be in a constant learning process… and it’s great to feel that finally I’m able to talk a very rudimentary Italian (ok… any Italian person that tries to talk with me… would disagree with my opinion…). I’m able to sit in the class for two hours and understand everything the teacher says… well almost everything… but she only speaks in Italian… So I feel great…
I just have to start running again… maybe Wednesday I’ll re-start :-D

One of the best books I've read this year

This was written in French... I read it in Portuguese... and I'll transcript it in English... but the meaning is almost impossible to be lost.

- Do you know the sentence: "It takes nine months to make a man and only one day to kill him" ... It's not nine months, it takes fifty years to make a man fifty years of sacrifices, of will, of... so many things! And when that man is done, when nothing more in him is childhood, nor teenager, when he is truly a man, all he has got left is to die.

André Malraux
La Condition Humaine

Sunday

Well to complete the weekend Sunday I went to Grandola.
It's a marvellous place... with fabulous beaches and great landscape. Truly one of Portugal treasures.
Here are the photos of the landscape… the beaches will have to wait (I ran out of batteries).

Thoughts and Things

My first month of work ever. I’m absolutely flabbergasted… not about my work but about the way I reacted to it. It’s absolutely unpredictable the way I’ll feel about my work tomorrow. Each day I have a completely different feeling about it. One day I feel it’s awesome, the other, I hate it. I guess I’ll give it another month before reaching a definite conclusion.
Hum… I guess I’ll have to think more so I can have a more rational opinion about work. But I have to say that there are days when I think: that’s it… for the next 40 years this will be my life. Fortunately most of the time I don’t think that way…
So Saturday I’ll have the last exam of my degree… at least of this degree. Next week I’ll begin gym and the driving licence classes and in two or three weeks time I’ll begin my Italian and English classes… I guess that’s a change to which I look forward.

Last but not least. Last weekend I went to Porto to see Red Bull Air Race 2007. It was awesome… really incredible. But the greatest part of it was the getting away of the routine. It was something completely new... and sometimes (as I write more than I should) new is good, but at the same time it was with a cool group of friends that tends to work great together (although some elements wore missing…). But I really enjoyed the weekend! (Actually it was only Saturday :-p cause Sunday I went to Grandola to the beach).

Porto

Then I crossed the river and went to Porto.
Here are those photos!

Red Bull Air Racing 2007

So I went to Porto to see Red bull Air racing.
I stayed on the Gaia side, and had a hell of a time!
Here are the photos.

Early 20's

So the other day I read something that got stuck in my head:
“…one tends to be a little dramatic in their early 20's”

I guess it’s true, after all if you read all the stuff I write it’s almost entirely about how good or bad I feel, what I think of others and other things in the same tone as everybody else.
Not that I was thinking of writing something different of what you can read in anyone’s blog… ok I wanted… I thought I would be able to be unique (I admit it was an arrogant thought)… now that I think about it… I thought I could be better than everybody else… or at least a lot more eloquent. It’s clear now that I’m not, either, better nor more eloquent. I’m just as good as the person sitting next to me in the bus and although in one hand that’s kind of reassuring, on the other, until a certain point in my life I though I was really good on a couple of things… and I now realised that I’m not… I realised that the majority of people (group in which I’m included) aren’t really good at anything. Not that we suck… but we aren’t extraordinary in anything… and that kind of makes me sad… yes I know this is also kind of an arrogant attitude… but I can’t help it.
Well I guess that I’m still in my early 20’s!

Another Lyric

Well it seems I must be hearing to much music, as I find myself more and more often listening to music that is the exact transcript of my fellings.
This time:

Silje Nergaard - Unbreakable Heart

Unbreakable heart play your part
In the scheming I have done
Not to fall for anyone
Or let love start

Unbreakable heart it's an art
You will master by and by
'Til then just be my
Unbreakable heart

You may get swept away
Like other fragile hearts
But don't you ever say
Love's breaking me apart

Unbreakable heart don't depart
From the pact that we have made
Love is forsakeable
My unbreakable heart

Working in August

It seems that I now belong to the working category… I don’t know what that means…
I’m working in a mobile telecommunications company but I didn’t understand yet, what am I supposed to do there. All the people in there are very nice, the atmosphere is great, but more than a week has passed and I haven’t received any actual work… something like: do this and it has to be ready until that day. That is what I was supposed to be doing… I think.
So my summer this year has absolutely no news… aside from my laptop being broken (I have to use my sisters computer) and my camera also broken (It’s being fixed… the poor thing). I have no news… I lose a lot of time in transports to reach the place were I work, and to come back again. So I’ll start taking my driving licence next week… The truth is that I have to admit that in Portugal you do need to own a car… the public transportation system is incredibly bad.
I’m anxious for September… lots of things will happen then: I’ll receive my fisrt salary ever, I’ll know the name of my coordinator for this year and last but not least I’ll turn 25 :-D

I’ve finished Harry Potter last book… all I can say is: If you did not read it already… read it! If you did not read the entire collection… read it! It’s brilliant

PS: While my poor camera doesn’t return home I won’t be able to post photos here!!!

About several various things

First let me say Norah Jones belongs to the group of exceptional. I really thought she was more marketing than any other thing, but after the concert I attended last Sunday I have to say… she’s much more. With the most awful organisation, with a audience that only was there so they could say they went to see Norah to their friends the next day, she just captivated everybody and gave one hell of a show. Her voice, her attitude, her energy, her karma… she is the real thing.

It looks like there’s less then a week left for me to start working… I really can’t understand what I’m supposed to do in a company. Am I supposed to add value to that company? How? I miss school already and it just ended last week. Is it really over that period of my life when I was just supposed to learn? Isn’t it true that the more I learn now the more productive I can be in the future? I feel that there is so much that I still don’t know… it’s really a strange felling.

And last but not least… I’m still me!!! I continue to have no clue what I want for me, what should be my plans for the future (I’ve found out that the best thing is to not have any) or even get my mind to feel the same way about something or someone two days in a row… I guess that’s normal, but I really would to like be that sort of person that has fixed ideas and plans and just sticks to them… or maybe I wouldn’t :-p

Because what seems almost always never is

Dream

In visions of the dark night
I have dreamed of joy departed -
But a waking dream of life and light
Hath left me broken-hearted.

Ah! what is not a dream by day
To him whose eyes are cast
On things around him with a ray
Turned back upon the past ?

That holy dream - that holy dream,
While all the world were chiding,
Hath cheered me as a lovely beam
A lonely spirit guiding.

What though that light, thro' storm and night,
So trembled from afar -
What could there be more purely bright
In Truth's day-star ?

Edgar Allan Poe

Setúbal

Last month I was talking with a friend of mine telling him how I enjoyed visiting London, and then he started talking about his trip to Paris… and then we both agreed we should also visit Portuguese cities… the truth is that we only pay attention to things like the buildings or the people when we’re in a different place, and the consequence of that is that we don’t know well the cities that are dearest to us.
So this weekend I went to Setúbal.
Setúbal is a city near Lisbon that has it’s economy all based in fishing… of course we went there to eat fish!!!!
Here are a couple of photos…

Different is good…

Well I’ve always thought different was good but I’m starting to realise that it’s not only good but great. I used to get anxious about change, I tried to avoid it and many times I’ve been extremely good at achieving that goal. But on the last few months change has always brought positive things with it, and if it brought any negative thing, I was just to occupied, enjoying the good ones, to notice.
I’m finishing university, I’ve already got a job, I found myself doing sport regularly (again)… among a whole lot of other things that made me reach the conclusion that most people achieve when they’re ten… Different is good!
Don’t get me wrong. I’m still a guy of habits even with change I need my routines, my absolutely unexplainable habits that make me feel “myself”. I need to read on the bus, drink hot tea in the morning, chew gum once a day, and a whole lot of other things that make me the way I am.
But if new things appear instead of resisting them, I’ll for once say: Bring it on!!

Human Relations

Understanding human behaviour is tricky and complicated. I think the two biggest problems that usually end up in huge misunderstandings are the believe that a behaviour of someone you know was induced by you and the second reason is the absolute impossibility to predict what someone will do in response to something you did.
I know that they look almost the same, but in reality they’re quite different. On one hand you have the necessity of understanding the actions of those who are around you. On the other, you have the necessity of pleasing, of repressing some actions that you think won’t be well accepted by others. The reality is that you have absolutely no control in the first issue and in the second, can only shape your behaviour based on assumptions that have absolutely no logical value, i.e., there is no way of making the predicament so we just follow a set of rules dictated by society and hope they’ll work. Unfortunately there are also two problems with that way of proceeding; the first and more obvious is that two persons that are subjected to the same conditions act, almost always, in different ways; the second is more obscure, it’s the fact that the set of rules isn’t equal to all of us, in fact, there probably aren’t two persons with the same set of rules… so would someone tell me what is the correct way to behave in a society like ours?

Citation

I'm a House fan... I really am! And the other day I was rewatching old episodes and this came across:

House: And that's all you are? Musician?
Giles: I got one thing, same as you.
House: Really? Well apparently you know me better than I know you.
Giles: I know that limp. I know the empty ring finger. And that obsessive nature of yours, that's a big secret.You don't risk jail and your career to save somebody who doesn't want to be saved unless you got something. Anything. One thing. The reason normal people got wives and kids, hobbies, whatever, that's because they ain't got that one thing that hits a man hard and that true. I got music, you got this, the thing you think about all the time, the thing that keeps yourself normal. Yeah, makes us great, makes us the best. All we miss out on is everything else. No woman waiting at home after work with a drink and a kiss, that ain't gonna happen for us.
House: That's why God made microwaves.
Giles: Yeah. And when it's over, it's over.

So I wonder... Am I that great?

About things!!!

First let me say: Stacey Kent rocks… well actually it would be more correct if I said: Stacey Kent Jazz’s… but getting rid of all the clichés let me try to put in words what that concert was for me! It was absolutely fabulous! She gave all of us two magical hours that went by without anybody noticing… she was magnificent! With a great band accompanying her, she gave what was probably one of the best concerts I’ve ever seen in my life! And the band, even with some slight slips of her husband in the saxophone, even with that, the band was brilliant… She sang in English and French, she said the usual few words in Portuguese, and the atmosphere was so good that she even said that Portugal was now, at the end of the concert, the likeliest place for her to launch her new CD… How about that?!?!
With a relaxed performance, with an almost divine voice, she sang old classics, new songs, two classic film songs and the band even gave us more than 10 minutes of just pure instrumental jazz… I’m still speechless!!! The only felling I have from that concert is that it doesn’t matter what I say about it… it will always be less than it actually was.

Second. Looks like I’m almost out of university!! Yes it’s true! Last report was delivered yesterday. Now it’s just a couple of exams and I end it!!! I’ll be doing a Masters starting September… and probably after that a PhD but for now all I know is that I ended my degree in Computer Science… well almost (there are still those last exams)!!!

Third. Summer has arrived!! At least to Portugal!!! 30ºC outside… all I want to do is go to the beach and stay there all day… of course I can’t (the exams) but I’m really craving for it!!! Maybe in a month time more or less!!!

The other day I was with my mother in the shopping centre and there was a store that sold little animals made of fabric to put on your clothes, purses, etc… and she said:

- The other day a woman went to my job with lots of those animals to sell, she said it was from a elderly home and that the elders that lived there wore making them so they could buy their dippers and medicines…

I have to admit I was shocked… Not from the elders getting an occupation (I actually think that’s a good thing) but that they wore doing that because they needed the money to live with some dignity. It’s really very sad that a country that belongs to the EU, and to the OECD, has to put people that worked all their life, working to pay for medicines. I’m also a little bit concerned with the general way of thinking in Portugal, the way of patching instead of fixing. That way of thinking can be resumed in one sentence: If people have no money to buy medicines, lets buy them craftwork so they can have money to buy the medicines.
I don’t like that way of thinking.

As the old saying goes: Give a fish to a man and he’ll eat for a day, teach him how to fish and he’ll eat for life…

Instead of asking for responsibilities to the government, we’re saying… Oh it’s ok, let’s not worry about this! I definitely do not like that way of thinking!

Well, one of my favourite singers is coming to Lisbon. Stacey Kent will be here Wednesday and my sister offered me a ticket!!!
I’m just unable to say how much I like Stacey Kent and how I’ve been wanting to see a concert of her for a long time and now I got the chance :-D!!
I’m so happy!!!!

Well London was awesome! What a terrific city. I loved every inch of it. Too bad it only lasted 4 days.
First of all I need to thank my cousin!!! If it wasn’t for him I would have missed some incredible things, like riding that strange bicycle with a driver… and also he got me my own room in London… how cool is that?!?!?!
Then I have to thank the only two people in the world that think I’m a photo freak… I kind of took more than a 1000 photos in 4 days… but they’ll get over it!!!
From London itself, there’s nothing to say… we all know how different London is from everything else… even from the rest of the UK. I loved the boat ride up the river Thames and the National Gallery… although I’ll have to take a week off just to see it properly! But in the overall I’m speechless…
I’ll just leave a couple of photos I took…

Well the ticket is bought and I'm off to London tomorrow!!!
Loads of pictures will be taken, and lots of problems and worries will be put on pause for a week... I've been in need for something like this for a long time.

Foolishness should pay tax… and I would be one of the poorer guys on earth :-D
Today I went to the gym as usual but the time I spent there was in no way near what it usually is. I felt without strength, without energy. After an hour of trying to fight my apathy I went to the bike… and as I wasn’t making the level of effort I normally do, I decided to pedal 5 more minutes. Of course the stupidity came with a price; When I finished the bike I felt like I was about to faint. I thought… well a little of water and I’ll be all right. I went to the locker-room and drank a little water but right there my body decided I shouldn’t be aloud to decide more stupid things… and so I had to sit down for a long while. Only while sitting there trying to understand why the hell wasn’t I in normal shape did I remember… I forgot to have the afternoon snack… so I didn’t had anything to eat in about 5 or 6 hours.
I grabbed a snickers from the vending machine and came home wondering how is it possible to a person to forget a meal…

My personal ambitions! I’ve written before about them here, but I’m returning to the subject without a specific reason or purpose. I don’t know why, but maybe writing about them makes me understand them better, or at least think about them.
I don’t have what “normal” people have; I don’t have a defined vision of myself in ten or twenty years. There are things I would like to accomplish in a few years but those things aren’t at all restricting about most (or all) things that will happen in my life in that same future.
I would like to achieve professional success, but I still maintain a very broad view of what I would like to work on. I would like to have a house near the beach, but I still don’t know the answer of whether I’ll be living there alone or with someone. And even the things I would like to achieve are very flexible, for example: Yes, I would like a house near the beach, but I know I would also be happy in an apartment on the centre of Lisbon, as long as I’m able to retain my way of “being” I think I’ll be happy in any environment, in any place, with almost anybody… at least that’s how I like to think about my future hopes and dreams.
Oh, I know… people say: There he goes again, trying hard to look simple. But the truth is that I don’t try hard, and I doubt that I’m simple. But I like to take one day at a time and hate planning in the longer run. I don’t like to impose myself specific goals that in the end may interfere with something I’m doing or accomplishing. If I’m able to act accordingly to this rule, I think it will be easier to be happy and fulfilled with my life.

In the last few days I’ve found myself wondering what it would be like to be lonely. Yes the word has a negative connotation but I don’t mean it in a negative way. I wonder what would it be like to live alone, walk unrecognised in the street, work in a place where nobody gives a damn who you are or even what’s your name.
I know that sounds like a very dark and even kind of gothic thought, but everybody needs their time alone… so what if you could take it without having to change your life?
I think I would like that…
Abstain myself from talking for a couple of days… contrary to what people think, I know, wouldn’t depress me or even make me sad… I know I would regain energy and joy. Don’t know how to explain it, but I sure know it’s true.
I wish there was a way!

Hurts to Purr… I heard some of its music in their myspace and I fell in love with their work. It’s awesome.
And the lyrics are so simple… it is what they say.
Less is more.
Here is the lyric of one of my favourites :

I didn't mean it – Hurts to Purr

I didn't mean it
I didn't mean what I said
now I'm lying here
with the leaves in our bed
make the sheets all rough
I am much too tough
on you
I didn't mean it
I didn't mean what I said
Now I can't eat my food turns to gravel
to sediment
I miss your mouth
what I'd give to taste that now
I didn't mean it
I didn't mean what I said
Should've just held my tongue
nodded.
But my hands were full
and my chain link words came out shaking so hard
they rattled.

Now tell me you’ve never felt this way.
And after you’ve heard the music tell me you don’t like it :-p

As good news usually come with not so good ones: Hurts to Purr no longer exist.

I haven’t written in a while here and the excuse I’ve been giving myself is my lack of time. The problem is I’ve been on vacation since the middle of February so my excuse is at least ridiculous. Then I came out with another excuse, this time much plausible, the excuse was that every time I had an idea to write something here, that text would probably hurt someone I know.
The reality is that that excuse has a point. I’ve been putting the blame of all the bad things that have been happening to me on others. In fact I’ve even been blaming others for things that didn’t happen and could only have happened if I was more objective and less undecided.
But as I’ve focused once in this blog I tend to write here only when I’m felling down, when something not so good happens to me or when I realise that I should made a different decision. So while thinking about it I thought: Today I’m not felling down, in fact what I’m feeling is quite the opposite, and I decided: I’m going to write more in the blog. I have a million ideas to put here, but lately I just formulate the text on my mind and when it’s completed I just erase it from my mind.
When I started this blog a few years ago I had two objectives:
- Practise my English;
- Write a little about what I though
It seems that in the last few (or not so few) months I’ve accomplished neither. I’ll try to change it!

Sometimes all it takes is a click, something to make you change your point of view, the same point of view that you’ve hold on to since forever.
That is what I believe has happened to me today. I had this pre-formulated thought in my mind for the last six months, and then, suddenly, out of nowhere, this thought just popped into my mind:
What if she thinks the same things of me that I do of her?
What if this is just a big misunderstanding between two people?
This raises two other questions in my mind, the first one is the obvious and direct one (If this new assumption is correct, what should be the next step?) the second one is more devious; Why do I still think the world turns around me, why do I have to think that every single action of everyone I know was taken/made/thought because I exist? It’s a serious problem of egocentrism and I really have absolutely no clue of how to end it… but I do however know how to minimize it (by simply ignoring my rushed, out of context and sometimes bias, deductions) and that is exactly what I intend to do.
So for now on I’ll try to ignore my assumptions of what I think made others take everyday, normal decisions… I’m just guessing that either it’s an impossible task or it will make my life easier.

Well, for the second year in a row it snowed where I live. If you ignore the last two years, the last time it snowed in Lisbon was more than fifty years ago.
So, as it is easy to understand, Kyoto was a joke, the goals of the European Union concerning emissions of CO2 for 2010 are also a joke…and what the US, China and India are doing can be considered a world scale crime.
The truth is that no one thought it would come so soon, that the climate changes would occur so rapidly. But the truth is it’s snowing… and it’s not normal.
Yeah… I know… what can we do? The fault is of the big factories… I can’t stop using my car to go to work… there is no public transportation system or if there is, it doesn’t work correctly. True, but if everybody started to use it. Well they would have to change it. Yes I know that’s not the way to go, it should be the other way around, and I guess snow isn’t that bad.

How is it possible for this to be happening? I'm becoming increasingly close to the end of my degree and I still have no idea of what I want to become.
I’m sure about the general area, but when it comes down to saying what I want to do… well at that point I have the certainty of a five year old that wants to be a teacher when he grows up.
I’ve seen lots and lots of propositions for jobs, and all I know is that I don’t want those ones. It should be easy… I like computer and internet security and there are more job offers in that field in my country than there are applications. But now that I have to sit down and try to figure out exactly what’s my desire… well now I’m not so sure.
In the end, I guess nobody is, and that I’m pretty lucky to have figured out what area I like.

I'm becoming tired of this commercial world we live in. Everywhere you look there is always something or someone reminding you that you don’t have some trendy cool gadget or that you don’t have the perfect body or even the perfect girlfriend or family. I guess I’m what they call an outplot, I like great cars, I adore beautiful girls but I don’t fell miserable just because I don’t have the latest Porsche or because the most beautiful girl in the room simply ignores my existence.
And the worst thing you can do to all those companies that want to sell “perfectness” and try to pass there image as the perfect one, is ignore them. Yes I see all those skinny girls and muscled guys and just ignore them… I don’t know if I would be more or less happy than I’m today if I belonged to that group of people, but I know one thing; I’m happy with who I am, and with the things I’ve accomplished in the last few years. Maybe there are people that see a guy like me and think; there’s a guy who lacks ambition… but they’re wrong… I have ambition, the only problem is that my ambition doesn’t involve a Porsche or being known by everybody.
I have my goals and yes they involve some money, the freedom to be able to wakeup in a Friday and decide I want to go and spend the weekend in Rome… but in our days that simply doesn’t require a lot of money.
My dreams tend to have less and less material goods and the only material thing I see myself spending money in, is my dream house near a beach. Living in Portugal that has hundreds and hundreds of kilometres of coast I don’t think I’m dreaming something impossible.